Monday: Nothing worth mentioning happened during my work day. After work I picked up my brother (like normal) @ 4:30ish & he drove home. I had PT @ 6pm. When I got there, my (4th & hopefully permanent) trainer was finally there, but her previous client came in late so that apt ran over... I did the stair master for 5 minutes, then the elliptical for 10 minutes before she was finished. She worked me out pretty good. I did some hip raise thing, stability ball crunches, this hopping on one foot for a minute thing, stability ball push-ups, lunges, stability ball arm exercises, & some awkward worship thing. I wish I knew the names. Then we stretched. My session didn't end until 7:15 so I got my full hour in. Then I of course forgot what locker I put my stuff in so I looked like a fool trying to unlock every locker, until I finally had to get the cleaning lady to unlock them all... She made sure to ask me the color of my bag to make sure it wasn't all a ploy to jack people's shit. I should have just called my phone lol. After that debacle, I sat in the sauna for another 20 minutes. By the time I was home it was already 8pm. I took a shower. In the sauna I had already drank a protein shake & wasn't very hungry so my brother ordered a pizza. I did end up having a slice. And then in went to bed.
Tuesday: I woke up really tired. I thought about hitting snooze but then I remembered I had a dr.'s appointment. So I got up. I was almost ready when my brother tells me he doesn't have to be to work until 9am & will be driving himself. I leave at 7:15am & make it by 7:40am. I sat in the car for the next 5 minutes trying to find A's social (which I never needed). I walk in & take my first #. My # was already showing as being called but there was a lady at the window already so I sat & waited. Then I was actually called. I was handed a form to fill out & as soon as I finished a lady from the back opened a door & called my name. I went back with her, she weighed me(116.9!!!!!!:D), asked routine questions, took my temperature, & my blood pressure. Then the dr. came in & asked why I was in. I told him I needed a refill. He told me I use my inhaler too often. Then he said that I need to go to the prescription window to get my script filled. I walked to the window, took a number, was immediately called & was told to go around the corner & wait for my # to be called. Again... I waited, it was called, I got my meds, got out of there & was at work before 9am. Work was the same, lame. As soon as 4pm rolled around I rushed home. I started a batch of crock pot oatmeal, did some laundry, steam cleaned some dog vomit, did some push-ups, used laundry bags to do arm curls, did more laundry, emphasized my body flexing, cooked some delicious chicken florentine, did more laundry, & went to bed.
Wednesday: Wednesday morning I woke up, you guessed it, tired. I'm beginning to feel like there's no such things as a sound, good nights rest. I mentally noted that at 9pm I need to drop whatever it is that I'm doing & get into bed. We'll see how that goes. My brother drove to work. Other than eating *leftover* chicken florentine nothing too exciting happened during work. I did however get a message from my mom-in-law. Since A left we've been dancing around our schedules trying to find a day that works to have dinner. We finally decided on next Tuesday. I really do not want to go though. I wish I could cancel but I know I can't. I know I shouldn't feel that way but I have nothing to talk to them about. I always get really bad anxiety. All they're going to do is ask about A anyway & I really don't want to talk about him... It makes me sad when I think about A so I try not to. I also feel like they're constantly judging me. Like everything I say is the wrong thing to say. A's mom is nothing like the evil mother-in-law stereotype but she's constantly throwing in "suggestions" about how we should do this or that. I've never had parents like that, & I hate feeling like I have to check in or like I'm being checked on. I don't know.......
Anyway, at about 3pm my brother told me he was hanging out with his friend & didn't need a ride so again I hurried home right at 4pm. When I got home my bro & his friend were waiting in the car, because he hasn't taken his keys with him. Luckily for him I went home before I ran errands. I changed shoes & headed back out. First stop was the bank. I FINALLY got my mom taken off my account, officially changed my name & found out the ETA of my new debit card. Also I finally got my tax return!!! (Of course I would get it when I'm without a debit card). Then I went to Old Navy & Target & I treated myself to 4 new pairs of sandals(2 from target, 2 from old navy) & a sweater. I had to use A's debit card but it helped extinguish the fire in my pocket. I also went & bought groceries from HEB. After HEB I unloaded groceries, made an awesome pita bread, hummus, turkey & spinach sandwich & unwound. Ry-dogg ended up stopping by & we smoked some hookah, he showed me some Allen Stone video he took & we talked. He left about 10:30pm & I went upstairs to bed.
Thursday: I didn't have to be into work until after my bros driving test (appointment at 10:20am) but I still woke up by 7am & did a bunch of food prep. I prepped salads, I prepped smoothies, I hard boiled some eggs. I plan on cooking some chicken to have on hand (for salads or whatever my heart desires). After I prepped I made a smoothie & some coffee, showered & got ready & drove my bro to his DMV test. I waited while he took the test, which he passed!!!!! Yay for not having to drive him around anymore! :P I got to work at about noon & the rest of the day breezed by. After work I had pt @ 6pm. I did elliptical for 15 minutes. I ran/pushed a weight on a sled type thing, I did arms on TRX. I did these crunch type things on TRX.
I had my TL a little more than a year ago when my third child was born via c-section. I was not told ANYTHING about the possible side effects of having this procedure. Since then I have experienced heavy bleeding lasting sometimes 3 weeks out of the month, weight gain, severe mood swings. Severe cramping, changes to my libido, severe depression accompanied by suicidal thoughts, headaches, migraines, many new symptoms & older issues are now exacerbated. The father of two of my children doesn't want me anymore. I've become too much of a pain in the ass I guess. We don't talk. We don't sleep in the same bed. I think he might really think I am crazy... & maybe I am. I feel crazy a lot of the time.
ReplyDeleteI'm unpredictable. I feel so angry about the whole thing & now what was once a mild fear of doctors has exploded into full on white coat syndrome that causes me to have a panic attack/hypertensive emergency (severe increase in blood pressure) whenever I have to deal with them. I'm not sure what to do... I fear the next time I have to see a doctor I'll have a stroke or a heart attack from the stress & anxiety of it... what do I do? I take my time and keep searching on internet looking for natural healing that how I came across Dr Itua herbal center website and I was so excited when Dr Itua told me to calm down that he will help me with his natural remedy I put my hope on him so I purchase his herbal medicines which was shipped to my address I used it as prescribed guess what? I'm totally healed my cramp pain is gone completely I also used his Anti Bacteria herbal medicines it's works for me very well I want anyone with health problem to contact Dr Itua herbal center for any kind diseases remedies such as Parkinson, Herpes, ALS, MS, Diabetes, Hepatitis, Hiv/Aids,Cancers, Men & Women Infertility, I got his email address drituaherbalcenter@gmail.com he has any kind of herbal remedies for women & men also for our babes. I really miss my Hunni...he's a fantastic father & a good man. He doesn't deserve this. I feel like an empty shell of who I used to be.